The British government's emergency package to create 200,000 new school places is a consequence of the UK's 'open door' policy, writes UKIP MEP Godfrey Bloom.
• Some 10 years ago, I was immersed in economic research for a small actuarial practice. How amazingly, mind numbingly dull. I only got through that period of my life with the help of a pint of hand-pulled bitter at the rugby club. The thrust of the anal research was on demographics.
It would seem then the British population would flatline post-baby boom for many years to come. Apart from those committed wholeheartedly to social welfare or Roman Catholicism, children were simply too expensive. The upside was that education budgets were frozen as the country ran out of babies.
The Ponzi scheme of state pension provision was in danger of collapse as we worried where we would find enough youngsters to pay oldies enough money to sustain their boom year life styles. Ocean cruises, the new Honda Jazz and golf club subscriptions do not grow on trees. And grandchildren need a bit of fiscal help or why would they visit us.
We were concerned that 'final salary schemes' did not work without young people to fleece. Lo and behold, it suddenly became possible. We were saved. Open door immigration would be our saviour, incidentally not just from Europe as the national debate would have you believe.
However, it is not quite as simple as that. We need, it would seem more than 200,000 new primary school places and the government is putting together an emergency package. This is all wrong. It looks like young people are going to fleece the old people. As we struggle by on £120 per week the duty on our booze, fags and petrol is going on education. As if our own children's school fees were not enough, here we are funding complete strangers.
But fear not - they will all grow up, pay income tax and rescue us when we are at the dribbling down the cardigan stage. But will they? They will soon realise working is not worth the candle. Why would you get up at 'sparrow's' to pick sprouts in Lincolnshire of a November morning with temperatures of -10 when you could watch the Jeremy Kyle show at home, snug and warm at the expense of your neighbour.
So there will be no one to do all those jobs to pay the tax to fund old people's pensions. Never mind. We can push the immigration door even wider. Welcome Mexico, Paraguay, Columbia. Join us if you will. Turkey, the Ukraine, Croatia and Moldova are already supplying our needs. We will, of course, need another 200,000 primary school places.
The British government will fund another emergency package. Is that not where we came in? Did you know that if all the people in the world stood shoulder to shoulder, they would fit on the Isle of Wight? So perhaps we should not worry. I cannot remember where I got that information; it was either Reader's Digest or Michael Caine.
Godfrey Bloom is a UKIP MEP for Yorkshire and North Lincolnshire